Is music at a funeral kosher?

By Rabbi Michael Leo Samuel

Rabbi Michael Leo Samuel

CHULA VISTA, California –A question came up recently in my congregation regarding the use of music at a Jewish funeral. The Reform Movement has long permitted the use of music at a Jewish funeral—provided the music does not derive from the Christian liturgy, e.g., Amazing Grace. Most Conservative and all Orthodox synagogues frown upon the use of music at a funeral because they feel it distracts the mourners from mourning. R. Isaac Klein’s book on A Guide to Jewish Practices, says nothing about it, one way or other. However, an argument ex silencio suggests that Rabbi Klein frowned upon this particular practice.

The question is not by any means a new Halachic issue.

About a year ago the Israeli Knesset member Rabbi Hanan Porat died; he was one of the founding members of the Gush Emunim, a religious Zionist organization that is very visible in settling the West Bank. At the rabbi’s funeral, his children sang and played some songs with a guitar that upset Rabbi Yona Metzger, the Chief Rabbi of Israel.  Rabbi Metzger made his opinion known, and is quoted as saying:

  • Rabbi   Shlomo Amar and I stared at each other and neither one of us knew what was going on –a band, guitars, children singing … One   might think that the people came to attend a wedding! But this was a funeral! I have never heard of this kind of ‘mourning’   before–not in Israel, not in Europe, and I am sure not in Yemen. We have never heard of and never saw such a thing like   this.[1]

Actually, I applaud the family’s innovative spirit—and I am sure the spirit of their father did not mind either.

The tradition of music in funerals is well attested in biblical, post-biblical texts, Mishnahic and medieval sources.

In biblical sources, the Hebrew term qînâ (qînôt), is an oral poetic music used for times of national calamity and mourning. The best known example of this kind of singing can be seen in the acrostic style of writing found in Lamentations. Indeed, one of the more extraordinary images of God in the Bible is that of a musician and composer. The prophet Jeremiah depicts God as mourning for Moab, “Hence the wail of flutes for Moab is in my heart; for the men of Kir-heres the wail of flutes is in my heart: the wealth they acquired has perished” (Jer. 48:36 NAB).

In the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus arrives at the ruler’s home and saw the flute players and a crowd making a tumult, he said, “Depart; for the girl is not dead but sleeping ” (Mt 9:23, 24; Mk 5:38, 39). The NT passage suggests that the flute players went to work immediately at the time of death, as well as the time leading to the internment.

Josephus writes that when the news reached Jerusalem of the fall of Jotapata to the Roman armies in 67 C.E., “Most people engaged flute-players to lead their lamentations.” This style of mourning was common throughout the ancient world; Greece, Rome, Phoenicia, Assyria all utilized the flute in times of loss. Roman funeral processions were especially known for being very noisy. Musicians used to lead the way blowing their trumpets, horns and flutes announcing the presence of the corpse.[2]

The wailing of the flute players, the cries of the mourners, the sound of torn garments, was unmistakably common in the cities of ancient Israel. Note that the Jewish mourners had no afterthoughts whether they were emulating the pagan gentiles or not.

In the Mishnah, we also find: רַבִּי יְהוּדָה אוֹמֵר, אֲפִלּוּ עָנִי שֶׁבְּיִשְׂרָאֵל, לֹא יִפְחוֹת מִשְּׁנֵי חֲלִילִים וּמְקוֹנֶנֶת R. Judah says, “Even the poorest man in Israel should not hire fewer than two flutes and one professional wailing woman [for a funeral]” (Ketubbot 4:4). Other Mishnaic sources speak about the use of pipes or flutes as a normal part of the Jewish funerals.[3] The rabbis lifted their prohibitions against women’s voices being heard in public for funerary rituals.[4]

Maimonides similarly ruled  almost 1200 years later,”  When a man’s wife dies, he is obligated to bury her and to have eulogies and lamentations performed as is the local custom. Even a poor Jewish man should provide at least two flutes and one woman to lament.“[5]

Why is the music of the flute so special? Maimonides explains that the plaintive melody moves a person to tears at a funeral.[6] The Halachic Codes all acknowledge this custom and treat it as law. [7]

One 14th century classical work on mourning, Kol Bo al Hilchot Aveilut  admits that although during the Talmudic period music was part of the funeral, he rejects its reintroduction because it would be as a result of non-Jewish influence (undoubtedly referring to the Christians, who used music in their mourning rites). Some Halachic authorities had no problem with music being played at a funeral–so long as the musicians happened to be Jewish (cf. Note 7).  It is interesting to note that this custom continued in Egypt during the early 19th century.

A very dear friend of the TBS synagogue died this past week. His name was Kurt Sax, and this Viennese Jew loved the Spanish guitar. In honor of his memory, two of his good friends played a couple selections  that Kurt really loved.  I can personally attest that the music was very  meaningful and moving for the family and their friends.

Was it traditional?

Maybe not by Rabbi Yona Metzger’s standards.

For the family and friends, the music was touching.

However, I will say Rabbi Metzger is right on one point. If a rabbi chooses to pursue such a path, it is important that he remind the people not to applaud, after all–it is a funeral and not a concert.

However, history has allowed and honored this type of musical innovation. I think Jewish law and tradition needs to become more innovative, as it once was before. A friend of mine tells me about his Uncle Jeffery’s funeral. “It was in the 1980′s, before AIDS was manageable, so he died tragically young. My uncle was involved with the theater, including the musical Cats. They played a medley of songs from the show before the service, and the famous song “Midnight” afterwards. I can’t hear that song without tears welling up.”

If Judaism is to be healthy, we must find a way to make our faith more appealing and less hung up on the external forms of Jewish piety. In other words, it’s time to allow music to liberate the heart that inspires and experiences prayer—in good times and in bad times.

In other words, it’s time to allow music to liberate the heart that inspires and experiences prayer—in good times and in bad times.

 


Notes:

[1] http://menachemmendel.net/blog/2012/04/27/music-at-funerals-or-why-the-chief-rabbi-is-irrelevant/

[2] Lucian, On Funerals 3.6, 3.58, 3.61 and 3.70; Pliny, Natural History10.121; Suetonius, Julius Caesar 84)

[3] Singing and instrument playing at funerals is discussed at Mishnah Shabbat 23:4, Mishnah Bava Metzia 6:1.

[4] BT Kiddushin 80b; Sukkoth 52a.

[5] Maimonides, Hilchot Ishut 14:23 contra Kol Bo.

[6] Maimonides, Commentary on the Mishnah, Shabbat 23:4.

[7] אנציקלופדיה תלמודית הערות כרך ט, הספד, טור תרט הערה 81  –  81.

משנה כתובות מו ב וגמ’ שם מה א; רמב”ם אישות פי”ד הכ”ג; טוש”ע אהע”ז פט א. וע”ע בעל כרך ד עמ’ עז.