Humoring the headlines: May 26, 2015

Lesser Known Summer Blockbusters Part 2

By Laurie Baron

SAN DIEGO─ Mad Blacks: Fury Road:  Heavily-armed figures prowl the apocalyptic landscape of ruins and rubble in strange-looking armored vehicles shooting at anyone who threatens them.  No wonder the residents of the African American neighborhoods of Baltimore, Cleveland, and Ferguson view them as the enemy.

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Glitch Imperfect 2: The first Glitch Imperfect was a docudrama about the roll-out of the Affordable Health Care website.  The sequel focuses on the suspense of whether the Takata airbag in your car will attack or defend you in a crash.  It was originally titled Total Recall, but its producer had to drop that title when Arnold Schwarzennegger sued for copyright infringement.

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Yesterday Land: A teenage girl skims through a draft of the Republican platform for 2016 and suddenly is transported back to a United States where the vast majority of citizens are white, women only want to be good wives and mothers, husbands are breadwinners, single people abstain from premarital sex, and homosexuals are treated for deviant lifestyle.

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The Terrific Three:  Superheroines Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Sonia Sotomayor, and Elena Kagan and their male sidekick Stephen Breyer fight to free Anthony Kennedy from the clutches of the Fascistic Four.

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Can’t Man:  Despite mounting pressure to resume the peace process, the Prime Minister of Israel fears offending his new cabinet more than antagonizing the President of the United States.

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Baron is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University.  He may be contacted via lawrence.baron@sdjewishworld.com .  San Diego Jewish World points out to new readers that this column is satire, and nothing herein should be taken literally.