Setting goals for our prayers

By Michael R. Mantell, PhD

Dr. Michael Mantell
Dr. Michael Mantell

SAN DIEGO — I recently went on the Rabbinical Assembly website and found 15 prayerbooks. Prayerbooks. Fifteen of them. Who needs fifteen different prayerbooks? I guess the Rabbinical Assembly, the international association of Conservative/Masorti rabbis believes we, the members of Conservative congregations worldwide, need them. But fifteen? Seriously?

This got me wondering about prayer. The Talmud, Berachos 6b, teaches us,  “[Prayer] is something that stands at the pinnacle of the world, but people treat it lightly.”  Lightly? With the RA’s 15 prayerbooks?  Are people missing something?

I believe the answer is a very resounding, “yes.” With the High Holidays coming upon us, perhaps it’s time to review just what prayer is all about, the value and benefit of prayer, and just why the RA publishes at least 15 prayerbooks and the Talmud refers to prayer as standing “…at the pinnacle of the world…” Perhaps with this deeper understanding, this year may be a New Year on many levels, particularly  with a new commitment to prayer.

The Torah, Deuteronomy 11:14 tells us that we should serve God “with all your heart.” What service is performed in the heart, the Talmud asks in Taanis 2a? The service is prayer, the Talmud answers. Our daily prayers are the equivalent of the sacrificial service in the Holy Temple, our most sacred place on earth.

But I’m an ordinary guy so who am I to think I can pretend to be doing the holy sacrificial service in the Holy Temple? The Rambam and the Shulchan Aruch, central books of normative Torah laws, say that great things are within everyone’s reach, so I guess my thinking like that doesn’t exempt me from prayer. Many people today do not see the need for regular, formal prayer. “I pray when I want to” they say. This attitude overlooks two important things: the purpose of prayer, and the need for practice.

Like the workouts I do in the gym, if I set my goal too high, I’ll give up. If I set my sights on lifting just a few more pounds of weight every time I work out, or run just a bit longer or faster, I’ll succeed and do it. Same with prayer, which has been described as a “ladder from earth to heaven.” Take a few rungs at a time starting on earth, make daily life just a bit better, and come closer to God with each step we take, with the reward of Heavenly blessings and assistance.

After all, King Solomon wrote in Proverbs 24:17, “Though a righteous person may fall seven times, he will arise.” In more contemporary words, these from the American Council on Exercise, “Winners are not people who never fail, but people who never quit.” Does this mean that if you fall you just get up again and keep going? Perhaps. But it also suggests something deeper. For a righteous person, or a fitness enthusiast, to succeed that person must fall, learn from errors, and grow past where he or she was. That’s what the ascending rungs of the ladder are there for, to help us grow past ourselves, to exit our mundane daily life, and achieve a closer relationship with God.

Does our distracted, unfocused, unknowledgeable and impatient “let’s hurry this up” approach to prayer and services sound like we are growing closer to God through prayer? No, of course not. It leaves us empty and instead of getting up again and again, seven times, we blame the prayer, the services, the Cantor, the Rabbi—anyone but ourselves for being “bored.”

More than 85 percent of people facing a major illness pray—more than those taking herbs or using other alternative healing modalities. Prayer is perhaps our most deeply human response to disease, and more and more evidence shows that praying has health benefits.

Since 1993, when Larry Dossey, MD wrote his book on the connection between prayer and medicine, Healing Words, scores of respected research has been conducted on the subject. The data documenting the value of prayer is impressive.  Harvard Medical School cardiovascular professor and researcher, Dr. Herbert Benson, suggests that daily prayer as a spiritual practice may help to deactivate genes that trigger inflammation in the body. He, and many others, suggests that the mind can impact the expression of our genes, which is gripping evidence for how prayer may affect our body at its most fundamental level. Prayer uplifts or calms, lowers blood pressure and inhibits the release of cortisol and other hormones, thus reducing stress on the immune system and promoting healing. Prayer can create feelings of gratitude, compassion, forgiveness, and hope, all of which are associated with healing and wellness.

Prayer in Judaism has two central purposes. One is to help us see that God is the only force in the world to whom we can pray. The second purpose is to help us understand our total reliance on God for our needs. What can we do to strengthen our skills in prayer, our understanding of prayer and our recognition of the benefit of prayer in our lives and those of our children?

Perhaps the words of Moses in the last weeks of his life may help as we see in Deuteronomy 8:11-17. Keep in mind that, incredibly, he was speaking to a generation that just experienced all of the miracles of the Wilderness. How utterly on target today.

Take care lest you forget Hashem, your God, by not observing His commandments, His ordinances, and His decrees, which I command you today, lest you eat and be satisfied, and you build yourself good houses and settle…and you increase silver and gold for yourselves…and your heart will become haughty and you will forget Hashem, your God, Who took you out of the land of Egypt from the house of slavery…And you may say in your heart, “My strength and the might of my hand made me all this wealth.”

As one Rabbi observed, “Is the commandment of prayer to render honor with the mouth while the heart is distant?” If our hearts aren’t in it, like love, it’s obvious, rote, empty and our lover knows it.  God knows it.

It’s time to awaken from our slumber. The mindset for prayer is referred to as kavanah, which is generally translated as “concentration” or “intent.” We need to remember that we are speaking to God and have that as our intention. If we do not have this minimal level of kavanah, then we may be in Synagogue but we are not praying; we are merely reading.

Look at the Amidah, the Shemonah Esrei, carefully and see that every conceivable human need is there. It’s up to us to spend the time to look inside this prayer and others, deeply, to connect with our “heart, mind and soul” to the words we read without expecting the words to jump off the page and grab us. We have to grab the words as the Talmud in Berachos 31a and Orach Chaim 93:3 teaches, “…not amid idle chatter but rather amid joy emanating from a mitzvah.”

This new year I encourage you to delve deeper into prayer, to spend the time to create more kavanah, to come to Synagogue more often, to grab the words in the prayerbook with joy and to feel the myriad of myriad of rewards of prayer.

Wishing you a “Ketivah v’chatima tovah(כתיבה וחתימה טובה) “A good inscription and sealing [in the Book of Life].”

*
Dr Michael Mantell, based in San Diego, provides coaching to business leaders, athletes, individuals and families to reach breakthrough levels of success and significance in their professional and personal lives. Mantell may be contacted via michael.mantell@sdjewishworld.com