Categorized | Baron_Lawrence, Lighter Side

Humoring the headlines: June 2, 2017

Laurie Baron

SAN DIEGO−President Trump contended that withdrawing from the Paris Climate Agreement will create more jobs in the United States.  Indeed, bids are already being received from construction companies vying for contracts to build dikes around the country’s southern, western, and eastern coastlines.

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During his speech about leaving the Paris Climate Agreement, President Trump highlighted that he was elected by Pittsburgh, Detroit, and Youngstown and not Paris to make America first.  Unless those cities were victimized by massive voter fraud perpetrated by tree-hugging illegal aliens, Clinton beat Trump by double digit percentages in all three of them.

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The Trump Administration has denounced California Governor Brown’s private diplomacy of forming a coalition of state governments to assure Canada, China, and Mexico that they will adhere to the Paris Climate Agreement.  What’s good for the Jered is good for the Jerry.

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Vladimir Putin speculated that “patriotically minded Russian hackers” might have been behind the hacking of the DNC during the American Presidential election just like “patriotically minded” armed Russian campers in green uniforms simultaneously pitched their tents in the Crimea and eastern Ukraine several years ago.

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Lebanon has banned the summer blockbuster Wonder Woman because it stars Israeli actress and model Gal Gadot.  Doesn’t its government realize that the film is based on the heroic battle between Angela Merkel and Dr. Poison the Earth?

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Baron is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University. He may be contacted via [email protected]. San Diego Jewish World points out to new readers that this column is satire, and nothing herein should be taken literally.

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