Categorized | Baron_Lawrence, Lighter Side

Humoring the Headlines: June 16, 2017

By Laurie Baron

Laurie Baron

SAN DIEGO−Congress held its annual baseball game to symbolize its unity in the wake of the mass shooting at the Republicans’ practice the day before.  Although members of both parties urged each other to be more civil towards each other, undercurrents of the political polarization in the Washington were still palpable in the game itself.

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After a Republican senator successfully stole a base, the Democratic infielder who failed to tag him out muttered, “We’re not going to let you steal healthcare as easily!”

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The Democrats relentlessly jeered the manager of the Republican team with the aim of antagonizing him so much that he would lose his temper and get ejected from the game.

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In a highly contested call by an umpire, the Democrats appealed the decision and demanded the appointment of a special umpire to rule on the play.

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Shawn Spicer was summoned as a relief pitcher, but took himself out of the game because Trump wasn’t behind the plate to call the signals.

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In the stands Mick Mulvaney hawked peanuts to symbolize what will be allocated to the elderly, the poor, and the seriously ill if the President’s budget gets passed.

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The Democrats won by a score of 11 to 2.  In postgame interviews, however, Paul Ryan and Mitch McConnell taunted the Democrats by reminding them they don’t have a chance of scoring such victories in Congress until 2018.

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Baron is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University. He may be contacted via [email protected]   San Diego Jewish World points out to new readers that this column is satire, and nothing herein should be taken literally.

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