By Laurie Baron
SAN DIEGO─ This week Donald Trump released a list of 88 former generals and admirals who are endorsing him. Hillary Clinton responded by releasing a list of 95 generals and admirals who support her. To top this, Donald Trump has released a new list of military officers backing him. It includes Captain Crunch, Colonel Sanders, and General Mills.
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Neither candidate liked the format of this week’s MSNBC Commander and Chief Forum. Hillary Clinton felt that the 30 minutes allotted to her was not sufficient to answer questions in any depth particularly after Matt Lauer dwelled on her emails for the first ten minutes. Conversely, Donald Trump commented that Lauer and he had too much time and requested that the moderator’s questions and the candidates’ responses be limited to 140 characters in the coming presidential debates.
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It is not so surprising that Donald Trump heaps praise upon Vladimir Putin. He has a record of loving well-built Eastern Europeans who flatter him and aggressively pursue their desires.
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The FAA has warned passengers not to use Samsung Galaxy Note 7 phones on airplanes because their batteries overheat and catch fire. In a related story, the TSA announced that it will detain passengers carrying the Samsung phones and Hoverboards as suspected terrorists.
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Oklahoma has shut down over thirty oil and natural gas fracking wells in the state which are blamed for triggering recent earthquakes in the state. The energy companies which own these wells have disputed the correlation. To prove their confidence in the safety of fracking, it plans to relocate their operations to sites along the San Andreas fault.
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Baron is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University. He may be contacted via lawrence.baron@sdjewishworld.com San Diego Jewish World points out to new readers that this column is satire, and nothing herein should be taken literally.