By Halie Soifer in Washington, D.C.
My week included both a bar mitzvah and a funeral. We lost my beloved mother-in-law on the eve of our children’s b’nai mitzvah, and these events – coupled with my husband’s family story – have left me reflecting on what it means to live proudly and openly as a Jew.
My mother-in-law’s funeral brought the family back to the European country they were forced to flee in 1938. For more than two years after their escape, the family awaited American visas in then-Palestine before arriving in New York on Presidents’ Day 1941. My father-in-law and his brother both joined the U.S. Army, and his brother returned to Europe shortly after emigrating to America to fight the Nazis. Their family’s experience epitomizes the immeasurable contributions of Jewish refugees to our nation’s history.
One of my mother-in-law’s favorite stories took place decades later in New York. As passengers in a taxi, they asked the cab driver if he was Jewish, and he boldly replied, “Aren’t we aaall?” The way she smiled and laughed when telling and retelling this story – with an emphasis on “all” – is something I’ll never forget. There was a sense of pride about being openly Jewish in America, despite being a distinct religious minority, that brought her great joy and stood in stark contrast to how she felt raising Jewish children in Europe in the 1970s and 80s.
Today, my husband and I are honoring our families’ legacy by raising Jewish children in America, two of whom had their bar mitzvah last weekend. While it’s hard to move forward with a family simcha amid painful loss, our Jewish tradition commands that we hold joy and sorrow at the same time. In case there was any doubt, a baby naming and 100th birthday were also celebrated during our sons’ b’nai mitzvah service, a reminder of life’s many happy milestones, even as we confronted devastating loss.
In their speeches, my sons spoke about their grandparents. One recounted the lessons his grandma taught him about forgiveness, respect, and equality, or b’tselem elokim. The other talked about our family’s “Mount Sinai” moment, as he and his brother were reading from a Torah that escaped Nazism along with my husband’s family and was dedicated to our synagogue in honor of their and their older brother’s bar mitzvah a few years ago.
For decades after the Holocaust, this stowaway Torah was stored in family members’ closets, including our own. Last weekend, it was carried around our synagogue in a procession led by our bar mitzvah boys. This Torah represents many Jewish American stories, particularly those who fled persecution and found freedom here in the United States. America granted many families, including my own, the chance to live proudly and openly as Jews.
Jewish Americans established a critically important place in our nation’s history because of the strength of our democracy, which has ensured our voices and views are heard. American democracy has provided the bedrock for pluralism, freedom of religion, freedom of speech, the pursuit of justice, separation of church and state, separation of powers, and voting rights, all of which benefit Jewish Americans, including my own family.
These democratic freedoms that have allowed Jewish Americans and others to flourish are now being attacked, eroded, and imperiled by Donald Trump, Republicans in Congress, and the conservative majority on the Supreme Court. While we have many challenges in today’s political climate, make no mistake – the future of democracy is the number one issue for Jewish voters because it’s inextricably related to our freedom, safety, and security. It’s the very reason families like mine came to the United States in the first place.
Under Trump’s immigration policies, my husband’s family would never have been welcomed as refugees. Under Trump’s policy agenda, the concepts of forgiveness, respect, and equality, or b’tselem elokim, are essentially nonexistent. Christian White Nationalism appears to be a defining ethos of the Trump White House, and this ideology disregards our nation’s rich history as a mosaic of religions, races, and ethnicities. It minimizes the role of Jewish Americans, exploits and politicizes the rise of antisemitism, and frames diversity as a weakness, as opposed to a strength of the United States.
Buoyed by pride from my sons’ b’nai mitzvah, and deeply saddened by the loss of my mother-in-law, I’m more determined than ever before to bring about meaningful political change in these midterm elections. This Jewish American Heritage Month, in honor of the legacy of those who came before us, and as a promise to the next generation, I hope you’ll support JDCA’s efforts to build a stronger future by helping to elect Democrats who share our values.
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Halie Soifer is CEO of the Jewish Democratic Council of America.