Satire: I Raised the Tariffs

I Raised the Tariffs (Melody: I Shot the Sheriff)

By Laurie Baron                                                                                  SAN DIEGO

I raised the tariffs
On both U.S. friends and enemies.
I raised the tariffs
I’m a genius on economies.

Who cares if stocks are about to crash
The rich gain more from the taxes I’ll slash.
I’m glad it makes the lefties squirm.
I plan to serve another term.
Until the factories return.
And I brag:

I raised the tariffs.
With the policy I unfurled.
I raised the tariffs.
We don’t need to trade with the world.

I’ll make us the richest nation
After causing some inflation.
If news anchors say it’s not OK.
I’ll arrest them with my DOJ.
It’s illegal to disobey.
And I brag:

I raised the tariffs.
You know they’re my obsession.
I raised the tariffs.
Don’t blame me if there’s a recession!
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Laurie Baron is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University.