The two offered Haftorah Readings for Shemini are 2 Samuel 6:1-7:17 and Ezekiel 36:16-38
By Irv Jacobs, M.D.
LA JOLLA, California — The readings for this week are two widely different ones. The rabbis apparently couldn’t agree to get their act together, so left us with two to choose from. Accordingly from one source, we have the less reliable rantings from the mad Ezekiel, the other from 2 Samuel.
1. Perhaps we should dispatch Ezekiel’s passages first. Here are excerpts, from the translation of Dr. Robert Alter [1]:
The connection to the Torah Reading is truly non-existent. The Torah Reading deals with a series of animal sacrifices, whereas the rantings of Ezekiel manifest his crazed sexual fantasies, however admixed with couple of memorable sentiments. Notable of the latter is: “I will give you a new heart, and a new spirit…take away the heart of stone from your body and give you a heart of flesh…rescue you from all your defilements…and make your crops abundant…you shall recall your evil ways…”
Here is his prevalent meanness sentiment:
And the word of the LORD came to me, saying, ‘Man the house of Israel dwell on their land and defile it…like the defilement of the menstruant [2]…
And I poured out my wrath…and scattered them among the nations…where you spread profanity…
But I had pity…Therefore say to the house of Israel…Not for your sake do I act…but for My holy name…I will hallow…[3]
Now comes the mandatory upbeat ending:
And gather you..back to your soil…cleansed of your defilements…And I will give you a new heart…take away your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh [4]…
You will go by my statutes, back in your own land…rescued from defilements…with abundant crops, etc.
I will multiply humans like sheep…like the sheep of Jerusalem on festivals. [5]
2. The 2 Samuel version of the haftorah does not ring as complimentary of God.
The connection of this haftorah to the Torah parsha is the symmetry of their readings. The parsha first celebrates the dedication of the tabernacle, and then records the deaths of Aaron’s sons, Nadab and Abihu when they brought “alien fire” into the shrine. Correspondingly the haftorah first celebrates the transfer of the Ark to Jerusalem, which is then mitigated by the death (by an ungrateful God) of Uzza as he tried to rescue the unsteady Ark carriers.
The scene is the ceremonious portage of the Ark, which was interrupted by unsteadiness experienced by the carriers. Uzza reached out to steady the Ark, only to be struck dead by God. This is an unbecoming, ungrateful intervention attributed to God! [6]
Here are excerpts:
David and the Israelites danced amid music by lyres, harps, timbrels, etc.
But when they reached Nacon, the oxen stumbled. Uzzah reached out to rescue the Ark, only to be struck down by God. This distressed David, who feared the LORD. He might have also thought: “God is fickle!”
Accordingly he diverted course from the City of David to a private home, where the Ark remained three months. He then had the Ark brought up to his ‘City of David’ amid near nude rejoicing and animal sacrifices.
David’s wife Michal, daughter of former King Saul, criticized David for this “naked” performance. Her reward from God: lifelong infertility!
Meanwhile David, expecting congratulatory orders from God to build a Temple to house the Ark, found only obstruction from God on this issue.
Here comes the mandatory upbeat ending of these contradictory passages:
The LORD declares that He will establish a house for you. After you die, I will raise up your son to be the next king. He will build the Temple for My name, and his royal throne will persist forever. Though I surely will have periodic causes to chastise him and his progeny, I will never withdraw My favor from him!
I find this Samuel text to be an exposure of God as an inconsistent, pouting, and ungrateful deity. No matter how loyal the efforts of the characters, God punishes them — over trivial matters that are essentially out of their control. He sounds a lot like Vladimir Putin, the present dictator, who seized control of Russia, and punishes both his people and the Ukrainian people.
[2] Ibid. Alter p. 1162, It is characteristic of Ezekiel’s troubled relation to the female body that he should evoke menstruation as the paradigmatic instance of defilement.
[3] Ibid. Alter, p.1162, As in the wilderness Torah story, God protects his own reputation in the eyes of the pagans.
[4] Ibid, Alter, p. 1163, a famous quotable line.
[5] Ibid. Alter, p. 1164 like the herds (not people!) sacrificed in the past in Jerusalem on festivals. Overall Ezekiel is one hateful dude.
[6] The text pulls no punches in exposing the Judeans’ God, not as a rescuer to be loved, but as a childlike brute, with nil compassion for events out of the Hebrews’ control.
Irv Jacobs is a retired medical doctor who delights in Torah analysis. He often delivers a drosh at Congregation Beth El in La Jolla, and at his chavurah.