Suppose you found an art masterpiece in a junk shop…

By Cynthia Citron

Cynthia Citron

LOS ANGELES–Bakersfield Mist is a brilliant new play written and directed by Stephen Sachs and starring the husband and wife team of Jenny O’Hara and Nick Ullett at the always-wonderful Fountain Theatre.

The play is based on a true story, and Sachs has raised it to a fine art, literally.  A foul-mouthed ex-bartender named Maude Gutman (O’Hara) has managed to lure a starchy art expert named Lionel Percy (Ullett) to her trailer to verify that the huge painting she picked up for $3 in a junk shop is actually an undiscovered masterpiece by Jackson Pollock.

 The trailer is filled with junk shop treasures and tchotchkes, including a lurid painting of a pair of clowns, which demonstrates her taste in art and obviously sets Percy’s teeth on edge.  He immediately launches into an inspired presentation of his credentials, which includes everything from heading the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York to serving on the board of every other prestigious New York museum, to writing multiple books and texts—even including “Art for Dummies.” 

Patronizing and pompous, he assures her that he is the major practitioner in the world, if not the universe, for authenticating works of art, and that “destroying forgeries” is his “crusade.”  He is particularly proud of his knowledge of the art of Pollock, and of what he identifies as his “blink.”  He claims that in the two seconds it takes for him to blink his eyes he achieves what he calls “rapid cognition” that tells him whether a work of art is legitimate.  “I always trust my blink,” he says, as well as “my intuitive repulsion.” 

She, on the other hand, “waits for the tingle” to tell her the worth of a piece of art.  “A Pollock painting will rewire your retinas,” he declares.  Then, warming to his subject, he delivers a long, passionate soliloquy on art and on Pollock that any graduate student would be proud to submit for a master’s degree.  It’s a tour de force, and it stops the show.  And it calls for a drink, which, breathless, he accepts.

Finally, she unveils the painting and he tells her it is not a true Pollock.  As they continue drinking she tries to convince him to change his mind.  She wheedles and flirts.  He tells her what backup an important work of art demands: “You don’t have any provenance,” he charges, explaining the term that identifies the history and sequential ownership of a given piece.  “I don’t even know the provenance of this outfit I bought at a thrift shop,” she counters indignantly, pointing to her bright green pantsuit and orange tee.

They spar for a while.  He tells her that the Metropolitan Museum of Art is “like the Vatican” and she responds, “Oh.  Out of touch with reality?”  He notes that his work is adventurous, “like Indiana Jones, but with a much larger expense account.”

And on they go, revealing more of their life stories than they had intended to, and eventually developing a certain unwitting respect for each other, and even a trace of warmth.

  O’Hara and Ullett are impeccable actors and they respond wholeheartedly to each other, to Sachs’ keen direction, and to his incomparable dialogue and humor.

Jeff McLaughlin has designed a wonderfully elaborate junk-filled set for O’Hara to bounce around in, Shon LeBlanc has provided costuming that is exactly right, and Ken Booth and Peter Bayne do a fine job with the lighting and sound design, respectively.

 Maude Gutman’s cluttered home in the Sagebrush Trailer Park in Bakersfield is an interesting place to visit, and well worth the trip.  But you definitely wouldn’t want to live there!

Bakersfield Mist will continue Thursdays, Fridays and Saturdays at 8 p.m. and Sundays at 2 through July 31st at The Fountain Theatre, 5060 Fountain Avenue at Normandie, in Los Angeles.  Call 323-663-1525 or visit www.FountainTheatre.com for tickets.         

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Citron is Los Angeles bureau chief for San Diego Jewish World.     She may be contacted at cynthia.citron@sdjewishworld.co