Summer Movies
By Laurie Baron
SAN DIEGO−Here’s a preview of several blockbuster films that will be released this summer:
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The Leftovers-The Movie: Based on the HBO series, this disaster movie begins with every American qualified for a high-level position in the government disappearing and shows what happens when an unhinged blowhard forms his cabinet out of the incompetents who have been leftover.
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Guardians of the University: In a world where vulnerable college students get their feelings hurt by arguments that challenge their views, administrations shield them by barring controversial figures from speaking on their campuses. This film features cameos by Ann Coulter, Nir Barkat, and Linda Sarsour.
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Wonder Women: On the day after a misogynist assumes the leadership of a powerful country, millions of women sprout pink cat’s ears and descend upon the streets to scratch his eyes out.
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Alien Broken Covenant: They arrived illegally as children to a mythical golden land, learned its language, and assimilated its culture. Promised that they would be able to stay, they registered their presence. Now the ICE Feds hunt them down to deport them to countries that no longer are their homes.
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Pirates of the Crimea: A swashbuckling bare-chested marauder runs amok as his ship invades neighboring countries, steals intelligence treasure troves from his enemies, and instigates mutinies on their vessels.
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Baron is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University. He may be contacted via lawrence.baron@sdjewishworld.com San Diego Jewish World points out to new readers that this column is satire, and nothing herein should be taken literally.