Humoring the headlines: July 31, 2017

By Laurie Baron

Laurie Baron

SAN DIEGO−President Trump declined an invitation to address the annual convention of the NAACP.  Now the organization’s members know what the hell they had to lose by voting for him.

*

North Korea fired another intercontinental missile into the Sea of Japan.  This could mean that North Korea plans to attack the United States or that it is merely waging a war against the Sea of Japan.

*

Russia retaliated against Congress passing stronger sanctions against it by expelling 755 American diplomats from the country.  Rex Tillerson thanked Putin for his cooperation in implementing the President’s request to cut the size of the State Department bureaucracy

*

John Kelly has been appointed by President Trump as the White House Chief of Staff to restore order and stop leaks in the Trump Administration.  His first acts were to place an ankle monitor on Anthony Scaramucci and the President, terminate their Twitter accounts, and cancel all their speaking engagements.

*

Although President Trump had urged Senator John McCain to return to the Senate to help it repeal and replace Obama Care, McCain voted against the measure.  What did Trump expect from a self-proclaimed maverick with a preexisting condition about to undergo expensive chemotherapy and radiation treatments?

*

Baron is professor emeritus of history at San Diego State University. He may be contacted via lawrence.baron@sdjewishworld.com. San Diego Jewish World points out to new readers that this column is satire, and nothing herein should be taken literally.