SAN DIEGO — Parshah Toldot, which was read this weekend in synagogues, tells the story of Isaac’s two sons, Jacob and Esau. Jacob is the third of our three forefathers—our line of ancestors who came before—the first three generations who formed the foundation of Judaism. Abraham and Sarah had Isaac. Isaac married Rebecca in last week’s story. This week, Rebecca gives birth to twin sons. The second one born (the “younger” son), Jacob, was born holding the heel of his brother, Esau.
Just before the twins were born, God speaks to Rebecca and tells her Jacob will be the one to carry one the line inherited by Isaac. The great nation would be born to Jacob, not his brother. According to the customs back then, It was always the older son who inherits everything.
Rebecca had a problem. Not only did Isaac love Esau more than Jacob, but Esau was born first and so would get his father’s blessing to inherit the land, the servants, and the right to become leader to the promised great nation. Rebecca feels she has to do something to help God’s plan succeed.
Rebecca tells Jacob she has a plan. When she overhears Isaac tell Esau, a great hunter, to go find a deer to make him a stew before being blessed, she is determined to ensure Jacob takes Esau’s place. She instructs Jacob to find one of his best rams and she’ll make the stew. Then she covers Jacob’s skin fur to match his brother’s hairy arms. Together, they trick Isaac, who is old and blind, that Jacob is his beloved Esau. Isaac blesses Jacob and he becomes the next forefather.
Isaac questions Jacob several times, as if he doesn’t quite believe Jacob is really Esau standing before him. Jacob is given many opportunities to tell the truth, but he sticks with his mother’s storyline and insists he is, indeed, Esau. Jacob fears his father will be angry when he finds out, but Rebecca assures him it will be her fault, not his, so Isaac will be mad at her.
When Esau returns and asks for his father’s blessings, Isaac realizes that he’s been tricked. Esau is furious. Jacob is afraid Esau might harm him, so he runs away.
What does this mean? This is one of several places in the Torah where someone does something wrong because it will be right in the end. Rebecca is telling Jacob to lie to his father, because God told her Jacob would be the son to rule over his brother. In an earlier story, Sarah convinces Abraham to send Hagar and Ishmael away for a similar reason.
Here’s an easier example to understand: Is it okay to steal food if your family is starving? Here’s another one: Is it okay to lie if your friend asks if you like her painting, but you think it’s ugly?
What can you do? There will be many times when the decision to break a rule for a good reason will seem like the best or easiest choice to make. In both examples above, there are alternatives you can use. Instead of stealing food, there are many programs to help people get food for free. Instead of lying, find something in the painting you do like or describe what you see without saying it’s ugly. (“I like how you used the purple to highlight the hair” or “Wow, the dog in your picture has five legs.”) If the problem is too big, ask a parent, teacher or rabbi to help you solve it. The next time you think about breaking a rule to solve a problem, stop and figure out a better solution.
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Marcia Berneger is a retired elementary school teacher. She loves writing stories for children. She is the author of such children’s books as Buster the Little Garbage Truck, and A Dreidel in Time.