Satire: Christmas Decorations

By Laurie Baron

Laurie Baron

SAN DIEGO — Wandering in my neighborhood, I sometimes wonder what the meaning of the Christmas lawn and house decorations I pass is.  One family in my neighborhood erected a 12-foot-tall menacing-looking skeleton for Halloween.  Rather than dismantle it, they placed a Santa’s hat on its skull for Christmas.  If I were a child seeing this bony creature, I’d be terrified about what would happen to me if I had been naughty during the past year.      

Then there are the numerous inflatable cartoon characters like Clifford, Donald Duck, the Grinch, Mickey Mouse, Minions, and Snoopy.  Did three wise animated figures bring gifts of Disneyland passes to the baby Jesus?  Was the green and red color scheme for Christmas based on the Immaculate conception between Clifford and the Grinch?  

Lighted white icicles hang from roofs and projections of moving images of snowflakes circle around the facades of homes even though this is Southern California.  The Gospels, however, never mention the date of Christ’s birth or what the weather was like. Even if it were December, the temperature in Bethlehem ranges between 56 and 46 degrees during that month.  Biblical  scholars believe Jesus was born in April.  Why don’t people plant red and green tulips to mark the occasion? Besides, this is California, and its Mediterranean climate resembles Bethlehem’s more than that of a frosty winter.  

I am puzzled that so few of my neighbors put nativity scenes in their front yards.  Isn’t Christmas the celebration of the birth of Christ in the manger?  According to Matthew, Mary and Joseph returned to Bethlehem from Egypt to register in the Roman census.  Luke adds that they couldn’t find an inn to give them a room and ended up in the stable where Mary gave birth.  So why so few creches?  I surmise many people living close to the Mexican border don’t want to concede that the Biblical story revolves around unhoused refugees turned away by many innkeepers. For the sake of authenticity and ecumenicism, I hope that the folks who do have nativity scenes on their lawns keep them up for eight days after Christmas to commemorate the circumcision of Jesus eight days later.  I’m not being facetious.  In the Middle Ages relics purporting to be the foreskin of Jesus were venerated.  

On a similar note, in the Gospel of John Jesus celebrates the Feast of Dedication which is another name for Hanukkah.  That probably means Mary and Joseph celebrated the holiday as well.  Perhaps all my Christian neighbors are unknowingly replicating the Holy Jewish family kindling the Hanukkiah candles symbolized by the profusion of electric lights that adorn their trees and homes.  

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Baron is professor emeritus at San Diego State University. He may be contacted via Lawrence.baron@sdjewishworld.com

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